Dhaka Drawings: day – Dec 25th

I just got off the phone from speaking to someone, whilst speaking, I was drawing myself – I wondered whether I was doing the right thing, I was questioned about how I treat people. Am I really fair? All this social justice and values that I preach, do I actually practice them? I am left disturbed more than I should be. An imposition of thoughts that reflect someones else’s will upon me. That I am being judged.

As the day went on today, I made it a point that I would draw – I grabbed my pad and pencil case and off I went – I managed some quick doodles whilst on the rickshaw, the rest of the day spent with friends.

Bizarre dreams aside, 2014, on reflection has been immense. It will take a while for it all to sink in. I keep thinking to do a Paraa post, an update on the work and the research, but I get overwhelmed by it.

The drawing expresses how I feel today. thoughtful, calm. steady. focused again.

I went to New Market to buy a book – currently reading Oscar Wilde’s The Picture of Dorian Gray, I picked up a Roald Dahl book  – My Uncle Oswald. To help escape the madness that grips me at times, and to rebalance my own thoughts.

An email from a friend talking about new years resolutions – I replied – ‘to continue drawing and letting go as best I can to Love. To not be afraid.’

Well, it means picking up the pencils and pens and continuing on. Looking at myself in the mirror, drawing what I see. Being honest to myself has been important, it has also been terribly tough. I have a wonderful group of people around me though, both family and friends to keep me going in the tough moments that life throws.
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